For the first time since Atlanta, I've spent a week in one place. Actually, I've now passed Atlanta time-wise.
I've been partitioning time between Cycle's in downtown Boston and my Flat4LV buddy Mike out here in Stoughton. Both places have been more than amazing in terms of letting me stay (though I'd be lying if I said I didn't have preferences) and I'm doing my best to stay out of my hosts hair (which is why I'm bouncing around a bit). Ummm, it's good. Yeah, I've been grinning a lot.
Well, this blog is about hashing, so I'm going to get back on topic.
Got to this week's Boston H3 pre-lube/start on time (holy hell-fire shit, how did I manage that?) with the promise of a heavy shiggy hash and boy did they deliver. In circle I was given crap for kissing ass when I said they've pulled the best shiggy hash I've done so far, but I wasn't kidding.
We started out at a pub in Central Quincy with what seemed to be a standard urban hash. Then, three checks later it started. I found trail through some bushes alongside a warehouse type building. Yelling, "On-On!" and blowing the whistle I picked up in Charleston I turned the corner (prominent FRB at the time) to discover a huge pile of... SNOW! Well, it was actually shaved ice, but whatever.
Immediately I started piling snowballs, getting about 5 made before the next hashers turned the corner. I let loose a barrage and invited them to help me ambush the rest of the pack. Slowly over the next few minutes our attack built and we loosed a massive flurry as the DFL's turned the corner.
Returning back to haul ass on trail we passed some guys sitting behind another building in a pickup drinking beer. I asked them for one. They gave one to Monthly Cycle (hey, she has tits, it's a persuasive argument), then... they gave a beer to me. Yes, impromptu beer-checks!
A little further down on trail we turned into a cemetery. Unlike the ones in Las Vegas this was massive with giant and varied headstones and monuments to those passed. A couple caught my eye, including a classic cross/statue piece and a really nifty pyramid that had every side engraved.
From there we entered a field. It's hard to describe because I'm not familiar with North East terminology, but it was a giant grass field with knee to thigh high grass growing on almost black soil with irrigation ditches running haphazardly through. If you weren't careful you could easily misstep and plunge three or so feet into some of the most foul, brackish water you can imagine.
Good, solid shiggy and not a briar in sight to lacerate me! Didn't even see poison ivy, which is a double bonus since I left the alcohol in Stoughton.
Well, all that careful jumping of ditches came to naught a half mile further down when trail led us straight through open water.
Maybe 100 yards long we were no longer land bound. The good was the water was maybe 2 feet deep at its worst. The bad was that the bottom was just loose mud, the kind that you sink up to your knees in.
I -of course- yelled, "Cannonball!" and jumped in, only to get brackish, foul water up my nose, in my mouth and just... nasty! However, nasty means good shiggy!
We exited the other side and ran through more fields into the beer check, the sweet sweet beer check. The only problem was, we beat the hares. They showed up about 7 minutes after everyone's arrival with beer. Singing and gallivanting ensued while rain started to pour down. This is hashing, this is enjoyment! I had myself another beer.
We continued on trail, more street, more fields, more jumping of tiny ditches before coming across a GIANT water crossing. At twice the width of the last one, I was sorely tempted to hijack a nearby rowboat tied to several other rowboats which were near a dock. I'm pretty sure we were on the edges of the Atlantic...
Trail exited by the boathouse where several people were watching our drenched, foul smelling selves climb out of the water as we ran into even more fields before ending on a beach with no clue where trail was.
My one wish was that the hares used bio-degradable TP on some of the sections instead of colored flour. Once night fell it got very difficult to see the pink flour on the ground.
Everyone tromped through the woods for a bit before centering on where we ended up having circle.
With three visitors (counting myself there were also two from St. Louis, PMS and Postage Tramp... may have been more, I was drinking...), circle was a riot.
I vaguely remember bits... but I was having fun.
Afterwards we all went back to the On-After at a local bar where we had pizza and more beer.
There was a woman changing in the Men's room, so I took it upon myself to change in the Women's. Turn about is fair play, right?
Eventually (shortly thereafter) everyone started going home. I'm not entirely sure, but I got a pretty strong feeling that the ending bar is not looking for our return. Maybe because we kept breaking the shirt-shoes policy (our clothes were drenched, what did they expect?).
Cycle and I rode the train with PMS and Postage returning to our respective places. I am apparently "adorably smitten" when drunk?
A long shower to clean the stench off was in order, followed by a really good night's sleep.
Today I took the train back to Stoughton, and purchased plane tickets to Europe. I leave on July 31st, expecting to land in London roughly 6:30 a.m. the next day.
I thought I had the car thing worked out, but my folks seem to have set up plans of their own. I'm really iffy because it's very cost prohibitive and I'm only 4 months in. Hashpitality is going to play heavy in Europe. At least I'll know someone out there within a couple months of when I go over. Hashers all have friendly faces, but there's something to be said for a familiar one too.
Next Wednesday will be my third (and last) Boston hash and my last in the United States until?
Time to ramp up!
On-On!
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Monday, July 21, 2008
Boston's shiggy hash is...
...don't know, didn't make it.
So Saturdee night Monthly Cycle and I went out to see The Dark Knight, which is a damn splendid film. Heath Ledger is (was?) the Joker and made that movie his. I almost feel that without his performance, the movie would have simply been a shell of what it was. Without giving away too much, (if you don't want any spoilers, skip ahead to the next para) the make-up team nailed Loeb's Two-Face style from A Dark Victory and the writers used a very convincing variation of Moore's The Killing Joke story to re-construct some of Two-Face's orgin. I also noticed elements of The Long Halloween and Year One in place. Superb screenplay, done well by the actors. I still feel that Bale grits his teeth a bit too much doing his gruff Batman voice, but I may be picking hares.
Nolan's director style felt like it jumped around a little bit, but his shot placement and certain sequences more than made up for it. In particular, when The Joker was blowing up a building in drag and driving the stolen police car down the streets. Very strongly done.
Cycle is a damn good cook.
So, the next morning we left extremely late for the hash (my fault, admittedly), and on the way figured that it just wasn't going to be worth it. She had schoolwork to do and I needed to get a hold of my bud from Flat4 to hang out. So instead we stopped by a bar called "The Alchemist" and ordered a beer.
While chatting and drinking on the patio it started to drizzle. The waitresses asked if we wanted to come inside, but we figured it was just a little water and we'd be cool.
About 10 or 15 minutes later it went from drizzle to torrential downpour. The umbrellas did little to stop the rain and we were soaked in minutes.
At which point the waitresses asked again if we'd like to come inside.
Silly them, that AC would've frozen us! We were wet anyway and getting a huge kick out of the lightning and thunder going on right over our heads (who said head?). So fuck it, we're just going to order another beer and enjoy this freak weather for all we can!
Meanwhile, random JP Boston dude comes off a bus and comments how kick ass the weather is. We naturally invite him to get a beer and join us outside.
It rains more.
It stops raining.
The sun comes out.
I drive Cycle home where we chill for a couple hours before I leave her to her schoolwork and I take off to Stroughton to meet with a good bud of mine from back in Vegas who lives out here now. A little later today I'm going to meet up with another F4 pal and hit a car show.
Flat4LV FTW!
So Saturdee night Monthly Cycle and I went out to see The Dark Knight, which is a damn splendid film. Heath Ledger is (was?) the Joker and made that movie his. I almost feel that without his performance, the movie would have simply been a shell of what it was. Without giving away too much, (if you don't want any spoilers, skip ahead to the next para) the make-up team nailed Loeb's Two-Face style from A Dark Victory and the writers used a very convincing variation of Moore's The Killing Joke story to re-construct some of Two-Face's orgin. I also noticed elements of The Long Halloween and Year One in place. Superb screenplay, done well by the actors. I still feel that Bale grits his teeth a bit too much doing his gruff Batman voice, but I may be picking hares.
Nolan's director style felt like it jumped around a little bit, but his shot placement and certain sequences more than made up for it. In particular, when The Joker was blowing up a building in drag and driving the stolen police car down the streets. Very strongly done.
Cycle is a damn good cook.
So, the next morning we left extremely late for the hash (my fault, admittedly), and on the way figured that it just wasn't going to be worth it. She had schoolwork to do and I needed to get a hold of my bud from Flat4 to hang out. So instead we stopped by a bar called "The Alchemist" and ordered a beer.
While chatting and drinking on the patio it started to drizzle. The waitresses asked if we wanted to come inside, but we figured it was just a little water and we'd be cool.
About 10 or 15 minutes later it went from drizzle to torrential downpour. The umbrellas did little to stop the rain and we were soaked in minutes.
At which point the waitresses asked again if we'd like to come inside.
Silly them, that AC would've frozen us! We were wet anyway and getting a huge kick out of the lightning and thunder going on right over our heads (who said head?). So fuck it, we're just going to order another beer and enjoy this freak weather for all we can!
Meanwhile, random JP Boston dude comes off a bus and comments how kick ass the weather is. We naturally invite him to get a beer and join us outside.
It rains more.
It stops raining.
The sun comes out.
I drive Cycle home where we chill for a couple hours before I leave her to her schoolwork and I take off to Stroughton to meet with a good bud of mine from back in Vegas who lives out here now. A little later today I'm going to meet up with another F4 pal and hit a car show.
Flat4LV FTW!
Saturday, July 19, 2008
America's Oldest Hash
According to the shirt that is.
Founded on 6/9/69 (isn't that quaint?) Boston's hash is known for A)
being in and around Boston and B) being a hash.
Great group of folks, roughly 40 showed up to Wednesday's trail which,
while shiggy-less, was a fun romp around the innards of Boston. I was
fortunate enough to run into Hare Club For Queers and another of the
fine Boston club that invaded Las Vegas for The Jizz Moppa's bachelor
thingy. Jizz himself wasn't present though as he was preparing for
today's wedding (for which the Vegas bachelor thing was held). See, it
all goes in sequence!
The on-in was held on the back patio of a downtown bar where
down-downs occurred, a great many songs were sung (even post circle!)
and fun gal named Just Deeley left me an awesome voicemail that
included words such as, "beer" "pitchers of" and "naked"
Awesome!
I got some crash space with Just Toj (sp?) a grand individual whose
living arrangements are unique so for for me in that there's like 8+
people under this roof sharing space. Only a couple of them actually
live there, but there are people crashing for a couple nights, people
staying for a month or two, etc. Very transitory and given all the
colorful signage aimed at peaceful co-inhabitance, very commune-ish.
Cool.
Last night was the Boston Full Moon Hash, the first one under new
mis-management as the founder, Jizz Moppa, is doing the marriage
thing.
Trail was a touch long, and at the end no one could find the marks so
we had to call the hares for the on-in location... However, each of
the beer-checks (yes, multiple!) were in very cool locations. Either
under bridges or atop lookout towers. Those were worth the effort and
highly enjoyed when found.
At the on-in Hare Club took on RA duties and masterfully led circle,
calling in various people for infractions whether real or imagined.
Including me for knowing too many songs and Just Deely for making out
with me (not really though, it was just a peck) during circle.
This went on for the better part of an hour and beer supplies were
scant. Nambla and Deeley went off on their bikes in search of more
beer (more beer...) and we continued on, stalling with some of the
longer hash songs (Free beer, Chicago, Yogi, S&M Man, My
Boy/Girlfriend is a Vegetable, etc.
Nambla comes back, we're still singling...
Well over an hour after, Deeley comes back with 60 beers on her back
having biked to three different liquor stores looking for one to be
open.
Hare Club calls her in for a naming. The usual stuff is asked along
with new information as she's been brought in for this before
unsuccessfully.
Names are shouted, my first one fails, more names are shouted, there's
a story involving bicycles and blood on trail. I suggest, Monthly
Cycle and the name sticks.
Circle ends, we're all hanging around drinking warm beer, everyone
takes off except me and Deeley, including the bag car with all my
shit!
So I crash at her place and the next day we get ahold of Nambla so I
can take the metro to meet him and pick up my bag.
Outside of a bullshit parking ticket, I'm enjoying Boston so far.
Last night I went camping out at Cape Ann. Tonight Cycle and I are
going to see Dark Knight in Imax. I should be running into Alyssa from
F4LV in the next couple days too. All while I figure out how to get
over the Atlantic.
Founded on 6/9/69 (isn't that quaint?) Boston's hash is known for A)
being in and around Boston and B) being a hash.
Great group of folks, roughly 40 showed up to Wednesday's trail which,
while shiggy-less, was a fun romp around the innards of Boston. I was
fortunate enough to run into Hare Club For Queers and another of the
fine Boston club that invaded Las Vegas for The Jizz Moppa's bachelor
thingy. Jizz himself wasn't present though as he was preparing for
today's wedding (for which the Vegas bachelor thing was held). See, it
all goes in sequence!
The on-in was held on the back patio of a downtown bar where
down-downs occurred, a great many songs were sung (even post circle!)
and fun gal named Just Deeley left me an awesome voicemail that
included words such as, "beer" "pitchers of" and "naked"
Awesome!
I got some crash space with Just Toj (sp?) a grand individual whose
living arrangements are unique so for for me in that there's like 8+
people under this roof sharing space. Only a couple of them actually
live there, but there are people crashing for a couple nights, people
staying for a month or two, etc. Very transitory and given all the
colorful signage aimed at peaceful co-inhabitance, very commune-ish.
Cool.
Last night was the Boston Full Moon Hash, the first one under new
mis-management as the founder, Jizz Moppa, is doing the marriage
thing.
Trail was a touch long, and at the end no one could find the marks so
we had to call the hares for the on-in location... However, each of
the beer-checks (yes, multiple!) were in very cool locations. Either
under bridges or atop lookout towers. Those were worth the effort and
highly enjoyed when found.
At the on-in Hare Club took on RA duties and masterfully led circle,
calling in various people for infractions whether real or imagined.
Including me for knowing too many songs and Just Deely for making out
with me (not really though, it was just a peck) during circle.
This went on for the better part of an hour and beer supplies were
scant. Nambla and Deeley went off on their bikes in search of more
beer (more beer...) and we continued on, stalling with some of the
longer hash songs (Free beer, Chicago, Yogi, S&M Man, My
Boy/Girlfriend is a Vegetable, etc.
Nambla comes back, we're still singling...
Well over an hour after, Deeley comes back with 60 beers on her back
having biked to three different liquor stores looking for one to be
open.
Hare Club calls her in for a naming. The usual stuff is asked along
with new information as she's been brought in for this before
unsuccessfully.
Names are shouted, my first one fails, more names are shouted, there's
a story involving bicycles and blood on trail. I suggest, Monthly
Cycle and the name sticks.
Circle ends, we're all hanging around drinking warm beer, everyone
takes off except me and Deeley, including the bag car with all my
shit!
So I crash at her place and the next day we get ahold of Nambla so I
can take the metro to meet him and pick up my bag.
Outside of a bullshit parking ticket, I'm enjoying Boston so far.
Last night I went camping out at Cape Ann. Tonight Cycle and I are
going to see Dark Knight in Imax. I should be running into Alyssa from
F4LV in the next couple days too. All while I figure out how to get
over the Atlantic.
Sunday, July 13, 2008
Google Maps can suck my balls
So, I'm in South Jersey and figure I've got roughly 6 hours to get to the Ridgefield H3. I take a detour into Cherry Hill to look for a non-existant White Castle (the one that's in Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle). With some help from Snatchsquash, I discover it's not there. Google Maps tells me that I've got roughly 2 hours of driving from where I'm at to where the Ridgefield hash starts.
I take the extra (presumably) 4 hours... no, check that, I decide to narrow my window down to 2 hours to try and find the closest White Castle and see if it's, "the one."
While driving I periodically check my distance and as I get closer to where the White Castle is supposed to be, I noticed that my driving time to Ridgefield (which was actually CLOSER than where I started from originally) now jumped from 2 to 3 hours. Oh fuck, I'm going to miss the hash!
So I divert away from the White Castle excursion and decide to high tail it back to the 95 and aim for the hash with the hopes of getting there on time.
Yeah... right.
Googlemaps has it's own fucktard idea of using EVERY SINGLE TOLL ROAD IN THE STATES OF NEW JERSEY AND NEW YORK to get me to where I want to go.
This means that it, A) adds another hour to my driving time because traffic gets slowed to a standstill at the gates
and
B) It costs me around $15 to get there. This includes a TWO MILE SECTION OF ROAD in New York that costs me $10.
I paid $10 to cross the Washington Bridge, seriously, what the fuck!? Am I supposed to feel some sort of self inspiring importance for either myself or the bridge because it cost me $10 to fucking drive across it into New York? Fuck that shit.
And for the time that I spent in traffic (roughly another 2 hours + added to the original driving time) I could've easily driven around the damn city and saved my money.
Google Maps sent me straight into a $15 traffic jam, turning a 2 hour drive into a 5 hour drive, costing me not only cash, but gas, my health (this shit is stressful, yo) and most importantly, THE HASH!
I ended up over an hour and a half late to the start. I threw my number on the back of my car and started walking trail.
About .5 miles in I get a call from Dancing Fool letting me know that everyone's at the lot doing a car run. I jog back and say my, "hi's!" before following everyone up a steep winding hill to the On-In.
It appears I missed a fine shiggy trail through the backwoods of Conneticut...
Everyone is thoroughly nice though and they set me up at a nearby hasher's house who is out of town. I expect to tent in the backyard, but there's a house sitter there who actually let's me crash on the couch simply because I'm a hasher. Good man, Lou!
The next day I went into NY via train (car's at the train lot) and despite posting on the NYCH3's Yahoo groups a couple days in advance, didn't get to meet anyone until today after trail.
I bought a ticket to Liberty Island (The Statue of Liberty's homestead) at 9 a.m., fully expecting to be back in town and able to hash at 1 p.m.
I did not anticipate a 2 hour wait in line to get on the ferry. As I left for the island I noticed that it was almost noon, so I posted that I wasn't going to make trail.
Afterwards I took the train to the On-In, fortunately there were hashers still there. Had a couple beers and introduced myself, then everyone went on their merry way.
I've since gotten to walk through Central Park. Met a couple parkour guys and got to injure myself jumping on a fence (good fun!) before taking a nap on a park bench.
I'm using a hotel's internet right now to do this and hashspace, then I'm going to take a 4 hour nap before heading out to NBC's studios on Rockefeller Plaza and trying to snag a standby ticket for Conan O' Brian!
I take the extra (presumably) 4 hours... no, check that, I decide to narrow my window down to 2 hours to try and find the closest White Castle and see if it's, "the one."
While driving I periodically check my distance and as I get closer to where the White Castle is supposed to be, I noticed that my driving time to Ridgefield (which was actually CLOSER than where I started from originally) now jumped from 2 to 3 hours. Oh fuck, I'm going to miss the hash!
So I divert away from the White Castle excursion and decide to high tail it back to the 95 and aim for the hash with the hopes of getting there on time.
Yeah... right.
Googlemaps has it's own fucktard idea of using EVERY SINGLE TOLL ROAD IN THE STATES OF NEW JERSEY AND NEW YORK to get me to where I want to go.
This means that it, A) adds another hour to my driving time because traffic gets slowed to a standstill at the gates
and
B) It costs me around $15 to get there. This includes a TWO MILE SECTION OF ROAD in New York that costs me $10.
I paid $10 to cross the Washington Bridge, seriously, what the fuck!? Am I supposed to feel some sort of self inspiring importance for either myself or the bridge because it cost me $10 to fucking drive across it into New York? Fuck that shit.
And for the time that I spent in traffic (roughly another 2 hours + added to the original driving time) I could've easily driven around the damn city and saved my money.
Google Maps sent me straight into a $15 traffic jam, turning a 2 hour drive into a 5 hour drive, costing me not only cash, but gas, my health (this shit is stressful, yo) and most importantly, THE HASH!
I ended up over an hour and a half late to the start. I threw my number on the back of my car and started walking trail.
About .5 miles in I get a call from Dancing Fool letting me know that everyone's at the lot doing a car run. I jog back and say my, "hi's!" before following everyone up a steep winding hill to the On-In.
It appears I missed a fine shiggy trail through the backwoods of Conneticut...
Everyone is thoroughly nice though and they set me up at a nearby hasher's house who is out of town. I expect to tent in the backyard, but there's a house sitter there who actually let's me crash on the couch simply because I'm a hasher. Good man, Lou!
The next day I went into NY via train (car's at the train lot) and despite posting on the NYCH3's Yahoo groups a couple days in advance, didn't get to meet anyone until today after trail.
I bought a ticket to Liberty Island (The Statue of Liberty's homestead) at 9 a.m., fully expecting to be back in town and able to hash at 1 p.m.
I did not anticipate a 2 hour wait in line to get on the ferry. As I left for the island I noticed that it was almost noon, so I posted that I wasn't going to make trail.
Afterwards I took the train to the On-In, fortunately there were hashers still there. Had a couple beers and introduced myself, then everyone went on their merry way.
I've since gotten to walk through Central Park. Met a couple parkour guys and got to injure myself jumping on a fence (good fun!) before taking a nap on a park bench.
I'm using a hotel's internet right now to do this and hashspace, then I'm going to take a 4 hour nap before heading out to NBC's studios on Rockefeller Plaza and trying to snag a standby ticket for Conan O' Brian!
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
I Love Rocky Hash
There isn't a Rocky Hash... why not? There should be damnit!
I spent much of Monday at Westminster meeting up and hanging out with a car club buddy of mine who moved out East (Flat4 FTW!). Tuesday he left for work and I drove out to Gettysburg to see all the wretchedness that the Civil War had wrought in order to bring us the country that we have today.
I spent the extra dough for a 2 hour bus tour around the entire field, hearing stories of battles and lives both won and lost.
A tad bit pricey (the tour that is), but I definitely came back with a profound view of what formed our country and an even deeper appreciation for Lincoln's Gettysburg Address.
The one kicker was that the bus tour didn't stop for pictures, so I spent the next hour hauling ass across the battlefield so I could capture images of what I'd seen.
Combined with a clusterfuck of traffic in the center of town and I had to haul even more ass (there was a lot of ass hauling going on) into West Chester, PA (suburb of Philly?) in order to make the Philadelphia Hash House Harriers hash.
I arrived about a half hour late, the same time as Cliff Diver from Rumsfeld H3 (an all men's hash) and we started following trail, running into a haphazard Dancing Fool along the way.
In and out of alleys, down and up streets, the hare, Mandongo, laid very well with no falses, but a few of the checks still threw us through a loop and by the beer-check (a stop in at a bar called Jake's where there were amazing beer prices of 50 cents a glass!) we were still about 20 minutes behind.
Shortly after Cliff Diver and I left the beer check we ran into Dancing Fool again, carrying a trash bag of recycleables while running down the train tracks. We all had an impromptu wild raspberry check then asked a Mexican family about which way "el corre loco" went before high tailing it further down the tracks to beat the train across the bridge (seemed like a good idea).
2 checks later and Dancing Fool was long on his own path. Cliff Diver and I came to a hell of a check and spent a good 10 minutes running up and down and over and around various streets and parking garages. He went one way, I went the other and found trail.
Yelling "On-On" at the top of my lungs I hoped to have him catch up to me, but alas... never saw him again (until the On-In that is).
Alone, in West Chester without a clue where the fuck I was, my only hope was to follow marked checks (of which there were few). This led to my downfall however as I followed a badly marked check into an intersection of 3 (count 'em) streets. I went down and up each and every one, never finding trail but finding a nice older asian lady who hosed me down while watering her garden (thanks!).
I finally went back into the park where the check was, went the opposite way that I had and ended up finding trail with the help of a casual jogger (yogger?) who just happened to be heading (who said head?) down the same street trail went.
A mile or so later I finally arrived at the start point and made it into the On-In, only about half an hour after circle had finished and the hashers were just kind of hanging out, eating pizza and drinking Yeungling beer.
I introduced myself, told them that "Martha says, Hi!" Which he really didn't say, but I figured that he would if I had called him to let him know I was in Philly and going to their hash.
10 minutes later Cliff Diver and Dancing Fool came in. Apparantly Cliff ran into Fool and they went to the nearby hospital for some water and to chill in the air conditioning for a while before just tromping back to the start (wankers).
All in all, good fun.
I grabbed a campsite for the night outside of town (after driving around for a half hour because the damn place I went to first was shut down...), then came back into downtown Philadelphia today to check out the Liberty Bell, Independence Hall, and a bunch of other touristy things.
It all culminated not too long ago when I parked my car by the Free Library (yes, that's what it's called) and threw on a hash hoodie and did my best Rocky down the grassy field the .6 miles to the Philadelphia Art Museum. All through hardcore driving rain. It was officially kick-ass.
I missed hashing with the Hokessin (sp?) hash in Delaware (Delaware... Hi, I'm in Delaware...) to do it, but plan on making the Ridgefield hash in Conneticut tomorrow evening.
On-On!
I spent much of Monday at Westminster meeting up and hanging out with a car club buddy of mine who moved out East (Flat4 FTW!). Tuesday he left for work and I drove out to Gettysburg to see all the wretchedness that the Civil War had wrought in order to bring us the country that we have today.
I spent the extra dough for a 2 hour bus tour around the entire field, hearing stories of battles and lives both won and lost.
A tad bit pricey (the tour that is), but I definitely came back with a profound view of what formed our country and an even deeper appreciation for Lincoln's Gettysburg Address.
The one kicker was that the bus tour didn't stop for pictures, so I spent the next hour hauling ass across the battlefield so I could capture images of what I'd seen.
Combined with a clusterfuck of traffic in the center of town and I had to haul even more ass (there was a lot of ass hauling going on) into West Chester, PA (suburb of Philly?) in order to make the Philadelphia Hash House Harriers hash.
I arrived about a half hour late, the same time as Cliff Diver from Rumsfeld H3 (an all men's hash) and we started following trail, running into a haphazard Dancing Fool along the way.
In and out of alleys, down and up streets, the hare, Mandongo, laid very well with no falses, but a few of the checks still threw us through a loop and by the beer-check (a stop in at a bar called Jake's where there were amazing beer prices of 50 cents a glass!) we were still about 20 minutes behind.
Shortly after Cliff Diver and I left the beer check we ran into Dancing Fool again, carrying a trash bag of recycleables while running down the train tracks. We all had an impromptu wild raspberry check then asked a Mexican family about which way "el corre loco" went before high tailing it further down the tracks to beat the train across the bridge (seemed like a good idea).
2 checks later and Dancing Fool was long on his own path. Cliff Diver and I came to a hell of a check and spent a good 10 minutes running up and down and over and around various streets and parking garages. He went one way, I went the other and found trail.
Yelling "On-On" at the top of my lungs I hoped to have him catch up to me, but alas... never saw him again (until the On-In that is).
Alone, in West Chester without a clue where the fuck I was, my only hope was to follow marked checks (of which there were few). This led to my downfall however as I followed a badly marked check into an intersection of 3 (count 'em) streets. I went down and up each and every one, never finding trail but finding a nice older asian lady who hosed me down while watering her garden (thanks!).
I finally went back into the park where the check was, went the opposite way that I had and ended up finding trail with the help of a casual jogger (yogger?) who just happened to be heading (who said head?) down the same street trail went.
A mile or so later I finally arrived at the start point and made it into the On-In, only about half an hour after circle had finished and the hashers were just kind of hanging out, eating pizza and drinking Yeungling beer.
I introduced myself, told them that "Martha says, Hi!" Which he really didn't say, but I figured that he would if I had called him to let him know I was in Philly and going to their hash.
10 minutes later Cliff Diver and Dancing Fool came in. Apparantly Cliff ran into Fool and they went to the nearby hospital for some water and to chill in the air conditioning for a while before just tromping back to the start (wankers).
All in all, good fun.
I grabbed a campsite for the night outside of town (after driving around for a half hour because the damn place I went to first was shut down...), then came back into downtown Philadelphia today to check out the Liberty Bell, Independence Hall, and a bunch of other touristy things.
It all culminated not too long ago when I parked my car by the Free Library (yes, that's what it's called) and threw on a hash hoodie and did my best Rocky down the grassy field the .6 miles to the Philadelphia Art Museum. All through hardcore driving rain. It was officially kick-ass.
I missed hashing with the Hokessin (sp?) hash in Delaware (Delaware... Hi, I'm in Delaware...) to do it, but plan on making the Ridgefield hash in Conneticut tomorrow evening.
On-On!
Monday, July 7, 2008
Baltimore/Annapolis H3
After a Saturday camping at the Capitol KOA (and amazing my campground neighbors with my hammock/tarp set-up that kept me dry the whole night during heavy rain), I drove down to Annapolis to hash with Baltimore. There I ran into Mr. Beanie Weenie, whom I met in Birmingham, who was in town visiting his gal.
How to describe trail... it was not pretty. I'm not talking about the shiggy, the ivy, briars or ticks (I got my share of all). It was roughly 5.5 miles laid out with about 10lbs of flour, almost all of which was hidden. I think the 5 of us who actually finished spent more of our 2+ hours out looking for trail than actually running it.
Hidden true-trail arrows, hidden flour, turns without checks, I try to limit my complaining when visiting a hash because I don't know the local kennel's custom, but this was ridiculous.
Combined with our getting kicked out of a section that went through private property (and in the process losing the beer-check), it was brutal.
Even one of the co-hares (laid 2 falses off of checks) was bitching at the end because he tried to do trail with us and got just as lost on the main hare's trail.
There were 2 graces, impromptu wild raspberry checks (there were several bushes along the roadside and in the woods) and the On-In which was a spectacular view of the Chesapeake Bay Bridge.
The RA held a good circle, with a naming, as Any Cock'll Do's son was brought in to be forever known as Blown-Back Mount Them.
What is it with the Brokeback naming themes? With good info to work with (his most embarassing sexual moment was he was doggy-ing a girl and sneezed on her back), why settle when you can table? Jussayin.
Anyways, we all hung at the beach for a good while, dipping in the water, playing with dogs, drinking beer until it pretty much ran out, then went to The Mexican Café for the On-After.
Great (if somewhat strong) margaritas and good food. The only major incident at that point was a very drunk Mr. Beanie Weenie walking over to the adjacent bar's parking lot and peeing, which almost got his ass kicked if another hasher hadn't stepped in (almost getting his ass kicked in the process).
I suspect that Beanie's going to apologize at (or before) the next Baltimore Hash he shows up to.
Today I'm visiting a Flat4 member who has moved out East, then tomorrow I suspect I'll be at the Philadelphia H3.
Holy crap, I'm actually up to date on my postings... Let's see if I can keep it this way.
How to describe trail... it was not pretty. I'm not talking about the shiggy, the ivy, briars or ticks (I got my share of all). It was roughly 5.5 miles laid out with about 10lbs of flour, almost all of which was hidden. I think the 5 of us who actually finished spent more of our 2+ hours out looking for trail than actually running it.
Hidden true-trail arrows, hidden flour, turns without checks, I try to limit my complaining when visiting a hash because I don't know the local kennel's custom, but this was ridiculous.
Combined with our getting kicked out of a section that went through private property (and in the process losing the beer-check), it was brutal.
Even one of the co-hares (laid 2 falses off of checks) was bitching at the end because he tried to do trail with us and got just as lost on the main hare's trail.
There were 2 graces, impromptu wild raspberry checks (there were several bushes along the roadside and in the woods) and the On-In which was a spectacular view of the Chesapeake Bay Bridge.
The RA held a good circle, with a naming, as Any Cock'll Do's son was brought in to be forever known as Blown-Back Mount Them.
What is it with the Brokeback naming themes? With good info to work with (his most embarassing sexual moment was he was doggy-ing a girl and sneezed on her back), why settle when you can table? Jussayin.
Anyways, we all hung at the beach for a good while, dipping in the water, playing with dogs, drinking beer until it pretty much ran out, then went to The Mexican Café for the On-After.
Great (if somewhat strong) margaritas and good food. The only major incident at that point was a very drunk Mr. Beanie Weenie walking over to the adjacent bar's parking lot and peeing, which almost got his ass kicked if another hasher hadn't stepped in (almost getting his ass kicked in the process).
I suspect that Beanie's going to apologize at (or before) the next Baltimore Hash he shows up to.
Today I'm visiting a Flat4 member who has moved out East, then tomorrow I suspect I'll be at the Philadelphia H3.
Holy crap, I'm actually up to date on my postings... Let's see if I can keep it this way.
Everyday is Wednesday
Reportedly the largest hash in the U.S., I got my opportunity to hash with them on July 3rd.
Parking my car by The Mall, near the Capitol Building I took a cab ride over to Farragut Station to discover somewhere between 80 to 100 hashers all gathering in a small park. With about a dozen virgins and 4 or so visitors to join me, it was hectic to say the least. The majority of these folk were runners and I did my best to keep up with the middle of the pack.
However, I wasn't really prepared to run at speed with them and used the three shot checks and one beer check to my advantage in keeping with the group.
It was for the most part all non-shiggy inner-city running with clever checks (almost all solved by the FRB's before I got there) but I (and a few others) was able to add a little more adventure by short-cutting a portion of trail via a 20 foot wall climb, punctuated by my catching an old nail in my thigh (yay for up to date tetanus shots!).
With a crowd that big, I was fortunate to run across a couple I met at the Peach Fuzz hash in Augusta so the familiar faces were nice. Then I ran into a hasher from Rhode Island who asked if I remembered Dave. Yup, comedy Dave that ran with us for about a year before disappearing to the East Coast. It took a minute for me to remember him, but recall I did!
Circle was huge and slightly askew. It's impossible to keep such a large group focused, but my hat off to the RA for a bang up job! There was even a naming, not that I can recall the name right now.
We circled up on the back end of a park near a skate park and a freeway. Nearby was a playground made up of almost entirely nets and rope. Forming webs of sort, many of us climbed on the structures like chimpanzees at the zoo. I hung upside down a few times, almost losing my beer in the process (but I didn't!)
The On-After was at a gay bar a few blocks from the freeway underpass where we ended. There we ordered more beer, played pool, sang karaoke and really crowded the upstairs of the joint.
I hung until late then walked back to my car, which (miraculously) was still there. The only car in the area.
I spent the night outside of town at an EconoLodge, then parked my car at a Metro Station and took the train in on the 4th. Walked The Mall, took pictures of the Capitol Building and the Washington Monument and a few other unique structures, then I ate some Bhutanese food and made my way over to the Lincoln Memorial to wait for the fireworks.
Several hours (and rainstorms... should've brought my umbrella, but it was almost 90 out and no clouds when I got there...) later I got to watch a spectacular fireworks show over the Washington Monument from the footsteps of the Lincoln Memorial. Amazing.
Afterwards I walked the Vietnam Memorial then made my way over to the Jefferson Memorial before catching the train back to my car.
Parking my car by The Mall, near the Capitol Building I took a cab ride over to Farragut Station to discover somewhere between 80 to 100 hashers all gathering in a small park. With about a dozen virgins and 4 or so visitors to join me, it was hectic to say the least. The majority of these folk were runners and I did my best to keep up with the middle of the pack.
However, I wasn't really prepared to run at speed with them and used the three shot checks and one beer check to my advantage in keeping with the group.
It was for the most part all non-shiggy inner-city running with clever checks (almost all solved by the FRB's before I got there) but I (and a few others) was able to add a little more adventure by short-cutting a portion of trail via a 20 foot wall climb, punctuated by my catching an old nail in my thigh (yay for up to date tetanus shots!).
With a crowd that big, I was fortunate to run across a couple I met at the Peach Fuzz hash in Augusta so the familiar faces were nice. Then I ran into a hasher from Rhode Island who asked if I remembered Dave. Yup, comedy Dave that ran with us for about a year before disappearing to the East Coast. It took a minute for me to remember him, but recall I did!
Circle was huge and slightly askew. It's impossible to keep such a large group focused, but my hat off to the RA for a bang up job! There was even a naming, not that I can recall the name right now.
We circled up on the back end of a park near a skate park and a freeway. Nearby was a playground made up of almost entirely nets and rope. Forming webs of sort, many of us climbed on the structures like chimpanzees at the zoo. I hung upside down a few times, almost losing my beer in the process (but I didn't!)
The On-After was at a gay bar a few blocks from the freeway underpass where we ended. There we ordered more beer, played pool, sang karaoke and really crowded the upstairs of the joint.
I hung until late then walked back to my car, which (miraculously) was still there. The only car in the area.
I spent the night outside of town at an EconoLodge, then parked my car at a Metro Station and took the train in on the 4th. Walked The Mall, took pictures of the Capitol Building and the Washington Monument and a few other unique structures, then I ate some Bhutanese food and made my way over to the Lincoln Memorial to wait for the fireworks.
Several hours (and rainstorms... should've brought my umbrella, but it was almost 90 out and no clouds when I got there...) later I got to watch a spectacular fireworks show over the Washington Monument from the footsteps of the Lincoln Memorial. Amazing.
Afterwards I walked the Vietnam Memorial then made my way over to the Jefferson Memorial before catching the train back to my car.
Saturday, July 5, 2008
Richmond H3
Camped overnight at Jellystone Park (Yogi Berra?) and attended the
Richmond hash on Wednesday. Hare was Rambo who I guess is known for
gnarly trails. I know it was in the G-H-E-T-T-O.
Residents actually called the cops to check us out, not usually many
large groups of white people in that neighborhood.
To put it simply, trail was short, nasty and (sorry Rambo) could have
used better marking when changing direction.
When the hare has to sweep and tell the pack, "Don't go that way,
can't you see the marks turning!" It probably means those directional
changes could have been clearer. We are half-minds after all.
Nevertheless, the rest of trail was well marked. Briars, sewer creeks
and all. I still haven't gotten that sliver of wood out of my shin.
It's not a real trail without blood, right?
Circle was also pretty quick (we figured it was a good idea to get out
by dark) with the FRB getting a paddle, the DFL getting a flag and a
little bit o' swing low.
There was even hash drama after everyone left between Rambo and Chew-my-baca.
See, Rambo had a tunnel, but not eeveryone had flashlights. Rambo
brought extras, Chewie got the dive light (not cheap).
Some point after the hash the dive light disappeared. Rambo asked for
it back, Chewie looked all over, but couldn't find it. Offered to give
Rambo cash for it, Rambo got a tad bit parental about it, "When
someone lends you something, they expect to get it back."
Chewie got pissed, threw everything out of his car, gave Rambo 60
bucks and... yikes!
Rambo took the money and left, I helped The Kitchen Sink and Chewie
re-load the car and we went to the on-after.
On they way there they stopped for gas, and while talking with Chewie
to calm him down, he asks me to grab the flashlight off the hood where
it was sitting the whole time!
I immediately fell over laughing. Chewie felt like an ass, but laughed as well.
Again we head to the On-After, this time stopping to help out a guy
whose car is on fire on the Interstate (can I count this as a bizarre
night yet?) which consisted of us telling him to quit trying to pull
stuff out of his car (there were no other occupants) before the damn
thing blew.
Once the cops arrived though we moved on, finally arriving to the On-After.
Rambo wasn't there so we ate, chatted with the other hashers, then
chatted with the Confederate re-enactment regimen that came in
(wtf!?).
Chewie and TKS offered me crash space, which I graciously accepted.
All in all a good, but damn bizarre Wednesday in Richmond as I got
ready for the Every Day Is Wednesday hash on Thursday. But that's
another post.
Richmond hash on Wednesday. Hare was Rambo who I guess is known for
gnarly trails. I know it was in the G-H-E-T-T-O.
Residents actually called the cops to check us out, not usually many
large groups of white people in that neighborhood.
To put it simply, trail was short, nasty and (sorry Rambo) could have
used better marking when changing direction.
When the hare has to sweep and tell the pack, "Don't go that way,
can't you see the marks turning!" It probably means those directional
changes could have been clearer. We are half-minds after all.
Nevertheless, the rest of trail was well marked. Briars, sewer creeks
and all. I still haven't gotten that sliver of wood out of my shin.
It's not a real trail without blood, right?
Circle was also pretty quick (we figured it was a good idea to get out
by dark) with the FRB getting a paddle, the DFL getting a flag and a
little bit o' swing low.
There was even hash drama after everyone left between Rambo and Chew-my-baca.
See, Rambo had a tunnel, but not eeveryone had flashlights. Rambo
brought extras, Chewie got the dive light (not cheap).
Some point after the hash the dive light disappeared. Rambo asked for
it back, Chewie looked all over, but couldn't find it. Offered to give
Rambo cash for it, Rambo got a tad bit parental about it, "When
someone lends you something, they expect to get it back."
Chewie got pissed, threw everything out of his car, gave Rambo 60
bucks and... yikes!
Rambo took the money and left, I helped The Kitchen Sink and Chewie
re-load the car and we went to the on-after.
On they way there they stopped for gas, and while talking with Chewie
to calm him down, he asks me to grab the flashlight off the hood where
it was sitting the whole time!
I immediately fell over laughing. Chewie felt like an ass, but laughed as well.
Again we head to the On-After, this time stopping to help out a guy
whose car is on fire on the Interstate (can I count this as a bizarre
night yet?) which consisted of us telling him to quit trying to pull
stuff out of his car (there were no other occupants) before the damn
thing blew.
Once the cops arrived though we moved on, finally arriving to the On-After.
Rambo wasn't there so we ate, chatted with the other hashers, then
chatted with the Confederate re-enactment regimen that came in
(wtf!?).
Chewie and TKS offered me crash space, which I graciously accepted.
All in all a good, but damn bizarre Wednesday in Richmond as I got
ready for the Every Day Is Wednesday hash on Thursday. But that's
another post.
The Trash!
One of the 'must hash' groups from everyone that I've talked to. I
unfortunately missed their actual trail due to some timing confusion
(I was at brunch with LaQueefa and Shit Happens with the impression
Trash started at 5ish, not 2:30), but with deft driving I was able to
arrive in time for circle.
What appeared out of the woods looked like some well shiggy'd hashers.
Pretty much everyone had blood on trail, mud caked over their shoes
and was pouring sweat (I'm sure the 90+ degrees outside didn't help
much).
Fafrumfuken (sp?) was FRB and for his earnestness, he earned a flak
jacket in circle, complete with metal plate inserts.
Circle itself brought about its own quirks. While there was no bibbing
(one thing for which the Trash Hash is infamous for), there were bags
of ice to sit on, awards (dinky discount store toys, possibly lead
paint based), and a toilet seat which Strawberry Shortcock promptly
wiped his ass with before presenting it to Urin8 for some savage crime
that I can't recall.
Down-downs followed, more people sat on the ice, virgins were
devirginized, someone did the robot (not true, but sounds good), and a
good portion of us went to Buffalo Wild Wings for the on-after.
Then I followed Fafrumfuken (my crash space for the night) around.
There was a girl, beer, no movie, and I tought them how to play
Caliente.
Many thanks to Fafrumfuken for the couch and shower, definitely needed
them both! And to all the Trash hashers for some grand hospitality.
Hopefully I can actually do a trail next time!
unfortunately missed their actual trail due to some timing confusion
(I was at brunch with LaQueefa and Shit Happens with the impression
Trash started at 5ish, not 2:30), but with deft driving I was able to
arrive in time for circle.
What appeared out of the woods looked like some well shiggy'd hashers.
Pretty much everyone had blood on trail, mud caked over their shoes
and was pouring sweat (I'm sure the 90+ degrees outside didn't help
much).
Fafrumfuken (sp?) was FRB and for his earnestness, he earned a flak
jacket in circle, complete with metal plate inserts.
Circle itself brought about its own quirks. While there was no bibbing
(one thing for which the Trash Hash is infamous for), there were bags
of ice to sit on, awards (dinky discount store toys, possibly lead
paint based), and a toilet seat which Strawberry Shortcock promptly
wiped his ass with before presenting it to Urin8 for some savage crime
that I can't recall.
Down-downs followed, more people sat on the ice, virgins were
devirginized, someone did the robot (not true, but sounds good), and a
good portion of us went to Buffalo Wild Wings for the on-after.
Then I followed Fafrumfuken (my crash space for the night) around.
There was a girl, beer, no movie, and I tought them how to play
Caliente.
Many thanks to Fafrumfuken for the couch and shower, definitely needed
them both! And to all the Trash hashers for some grand hospitality.
Hopefully I can actually do a trail next time!
Tuesday, July 1, 2008
15 Minute Quickie
I'm on short time here, but I've got a lot of hashing to cover, so I'll (regrettably?) have to keep it short and sweet.
I arrived in Gainesville, Florida on Friday at the invite of Scrubby Chubby who visited the Daytona, Florida hash the same time I was there.
I arrived at the start fairly early, early enough to meet a transplant from Hawaii who was wondering if we were at the proper run start (like hell if I knew!).
Eventually more hashers arrived, along with the hares, Ganja Ninja and VaDryNa, who were theme appropriate in catholic schoolgirl uniforms (!?). I threw my boxers on over my run shorts to simulate as best I could.
Trail was a nice jaunt around the neighborhoods, mostly pavement, but ending with a trek down a stream in which only the hares got wet as we wisely followed the jogging trail that ran alongside the moistness.
The end of the 3rd bridge also marked a theoretical hare snare as I raced ahead (race-ist bastard) and cut the hares off as they were laying TP in the creek. A quick thinking Ganja Ninja marked Beer Check and we waited for the rest of the pack to walk the next 30 yards (!?) to the actual beer check. Sneaky Bastards!
Circle was grand inside a local pub and then we migrated to Ganja's to crash the night and de-alcoholize.
End Gainesville
Start Charleston
I arrived the next day with help from Squat and Swallow to Revolving Whore's house where the Happy Heritic H3 was starting trail. It was a slightly confusing arrangement of flour as trail lapped over itself several times and off a check I came into a later part of trail and we all finished before the hares. WELL before the hares!
We had an impromptu Beer Stop before we took off again, this time on the correct trail, which was also deviated later on as an incoming tide washed out a large section that the hare had set.
We all took the opportunity (well, most of us) to wallow, which caused my ass to burn (?) so I got out quickly. I'd rather not know what I was neck deep in...
Trail included a stinky creek, a ladder climb and an on-in. Shit Happens held a great circle with a Cone of Silence to shut up the loud ones, then the on-after consisted of food, nudity, hot-tubs and a hammock. You put it together, I was drinking beer and watching. I think a motorcycle was involved at one point.
I'm out of time, so I'll have to re-hash the Trash Hash next time.
I arrived in Gainesville, Florida on Friday at the invite of Scrubby Chubby who visited the Daytona, Florida hash the same time I was there.
I arrived at the start fairly early, early enough to meet a transplant from Hawaii who was wondering if we were at the proper run start (like hell if I knew!).
Eventually more hashers arrived, along with the hares, Ganja Ninja and VaDryNa, who were theme appropriate in catholic schoolgirl uniforms (!?). I threw my boxers on over my run shorts to simulate as best I could.
Trail was a nice jaunt around the neighborhoods, mostly pavement, but ending with a trek down a stream in which only the hares got wet as we wisely followed the jogging trail that ran alongside the moistness.
The end of the 3rd bridge also marked a theoretical hare snare as I raced ahead (race-ist bastard) and cut the hares off as they were laying TP in the creek. A quick thinking Ganja Ninja marked Beer Check and we waited for the rest of the pack to walk the next 30 yards (!?) to the actual beer check. Sneaky Bastards!
Circle was grand inside a local pub and then we migrated to Ganja's to crash the night and de-alcoholize.
End Gainesville
Start Charleston
I arrived the next day with help from Squat and Swallow to Revolving Whore's house where the Happy Heritic H3 was starting trail. It was a slightly confusing arrangement of flour as trail lapped over itself several times and off a check I came into a later part of trail and we all finished before the hares. WELL before the hares!
We had an impromptu Beer Stop before we took off again, this time on the correct trail, which was also deviated later on as an incoming tide washed out a large section that the hare had set.
We all took the opportunity (well, most of us) to wallow, which caused my ass to burn (?) so I got out quickly. I'd rather not know what I was neck deep in...
Trail included a stinky creek, a ladder climb and an on-in. Shit Happens held a great circle with a Cone of Silence to shut up the loud ones, then the on-after consisted of food, nudity, hot-tubs and a hammock. You put it together, I was drinking beer and watching. I think a motorcycle was involved at one point.
I'm out of time, so I'll have to re-hash the Trash Hash next time.
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